Yes, you read right, dear readers!  I finally got up the nerve to join the Random Dungeon Finder as a tank.  I was slightly disappointed that I wasn't thrown an invite in 10 seconds, but it was still pretty quick!

It ended up that I got a group that had already started Utgarde Keep - they were only three pulls in and this is what I see:

[RetPally]:  You better be a real tank Cel, or we're kicking you - I'm just telling you now
[RetPally]:  And you better be Frost
[HealSham]:  Fo' real
[Me]:  Oh shit

Since, y'know... this was my first instance as a tank ever, I'm sure I didn't fall into the "real tank" category.  However, I didn't tell them this and apparently being specced Frost was enough for them.  It turned out that they were the pushy group that was all, "Go go go NOW NOW NOW" and we had that boomkin that was always inching towards everything and "accidentally" pulling.  Because they wanted to blast through so quickly, Utgarde Keep was really a blur to me that time - my hands were shaking, I was mashing buttons blindly and when Lus came in from work, I wouldn't even look at him.  I (practically) snapped at him, "I can't talk to you right now.  I'm trying not to be horrible."  In my defense, it was the first boss fight and my first boss fight ever as a Real Tank™.

In fact, it went well enough that after the last boss I was invited to join their guild - to be leveled up and geared up so I was on par with everyone else.  I was extremely flattered by this and it boosted my confidence a lot and I took it as a sign that I hadn't fallen into the dreaded Fail Knight category.  They pushed the guild thing more... I demurred, thinking that by saying, "I'm probably not as experienced a tank as you're looking for" wasn't a lie of omission but I finally go the point across - a whole instance later.

I was invited after UK to go run the Nexus - although I did make it clear that I hadn't run it in a LONG time and hadn't ever tanked it.  "You'll be fine!" they assured me.  That instance went pretty smoothly too (despite the damn boomkin with a death wish) but my biggest screw up was porting out of the instance after Ormorok the Tree-Shaper thinking we were done.  It had been so long and I was still so wired that I had completely forgotten Keristrasza!  (Yes, I did feel the shame.)  However, no other blunders were made, tanking or otherwise.

The First Foray into Tanking:  Good!  I'm not paralyzed with fear like I was before I actually queued, but I'm still a little shaky in my tanking boots.  However, now that the first steps have been taken, I know I'll get better with practice.  I had the usual post-First fears that I voiced to Naithin and he gave me this advice:

Mashing buttons and making it look convincing is what tanking is all about!  Class changes merely how hard you need to mash and what it looks like on screen!

So, you remember that post that I wrote about the new LFG tool?  This one?  Oh, and maybe some of you on twitter remember this particular tweet:

The Elitists:  Don't think I'd hear this EVER: RT @anea: off to PuG more! :D

Apparently some minor God of Fate was listening and decided to have a little fun, because ever since I gushed about how awesome the system is and how I love it... I've just had the most terrible luck with PuGs.

I didn't even want to write about it, since I felt it would diminish what I said earlier, but I just can't take it any more.  I told myself that of course bad PuGs are in order, I just have to roll with the punches.  And I do know that sometimes PuGs will break up and things will be hard - but the thing is I seem to be the only person in the group willing to work on something and try again.  Everyone wants to ditch the party at the first sign of trouble.

The first Bad PuG I had I think I've managed to block out because I can't remember it clearly (or I've just had so many that they're all running together, I'm not sure) but it was in Shadow Labs.  But, have no doubt that our corpses littered the floor like soda cans at a subway station and the mobs had strung our guts around the place like garlands.  Just dying again and again and again and again and again.  For no good reason!  The tank just needed to understand that if we know the mobs fear... why don't let's pull them into the hallway so that when we do get feared, we'll only be feared in the hallway and not pull the other mobs?  People left soon after (not that I can blame them in that instance.)

The second through perhaps fifth Bad PuG were simple issues that could've been fixed but at the first sign of trouble (either a Close Call or a wipe) people were dropping (party) like flies.  Now, I don't know about you, but I think it's so much easier to work on a problem than drop party and wait another half hour for a group to be fully assembled and have all the people accept an invitation to the dungeon.  It just takes too long. 

I know now that heirlooms are out, people are flying through levels and are all hot to trot to get to 80 and endgame and I know that everyone said that Wrath was so easy right when it came out, but did eveyone really forget how to learn something and work on it - even though it requies a few wipes?  One PuG in Utgarde Keep the first time through, we wiped twice on the second boss.  Twice we tried and failed.  Someone got pissed and left - while waiting for a new group member I went to look the boss up on wowhead and relayed the strats to everyone.  I expected everyone to say, "Ok, got it, let's try it again!"  But one pally said, "We shouldn't need to look up strats, my guild never did." and it just infuriated me that he's being so pompous about it - if he really knew this dungeon so well that he "didn't need strats" why didn't he contribute an idea to ways to approach the boss?  And strats are not a bad thing at all - if there are certain ways to do a fight that make sense and make it easier or even just possible in the first place, why not utilize that?

I tried to put myself in the other people's shoes.  The snotty paladin critiquing everyone and their gear/spec/life?  He would rather breeze through an instance with zero trouble rather than work on it.  Probably because his main is in a great guild who can do just that and he's gotten used to it. 

Ok, so maybe I didn't put myself in everyone's shoes, but the poor tank struggling to get things done in the last PuG I did?  I could imagine that being me in a little over half a level and I felt a little scared.

I told myself that I'd try out tanking when I got to 70 - I have gear in the bank, I have a new shiny weapon, I have the gold to facilitate dual specs... I just need to do it.  Thanks to a helpful link from @bossypally, I've found an article that doesn't badmouth frost the entire way through.  Yes, I want to tank Frost.  I'm not entertaining tanking as Unholy or Blood, thank you for asking.  I've got a spec planned out, I just need to put the plan in motion.

However, I've never tanked before (besides that one night in Zul'Farrak on the warrior) and it's still kinda scary.  As I'm getting closer to 70, I'm seeing all the things that scared me before (the whole being in charge thing, marking, taking the blame if we wipe) and I wonder if I'm ready.  I'm sure that after some trial and error I'll get things figured out - I just need to keep a clear head the first few times.  However, I'm remembering how everyone will leave when things seem shaky and I wonder how I'll ever keep a group together for me to try tanking in the first place!

The other issue that I'm slightly worried about is that I've not been through these dungeons in a long time.  I very vaguely remember Utgarde Keep, which is the only place the daily random has sent me so far.  I know that I could look them up on wowhead or somesuch, but I think it's best to learn them by doing.  After seeing how ruthless groups can be...  *gulp*  The combined idiocy of battlegroups can be rather daunting.